Anyway, back to the booth. As we can see from BMW’s render, it looks like it should accommodate multiple cars, and the giant grilles feature some neat Easter Eggs. Not only is there an M3 Competition emblem on the upper right slat, the right grille appears to feature a giant parking sensor. More importantly, this big-grilled booth makes a statement, and that statement is “y’all can suck it; this is who we are now.”
A post shared by ANTI-BMW BMW CLUB (@antibmwbmwclub) It’s no secret that BMW’s latest styling language has been the subject of vitriol in the press and from fans, and rightly so. BMW’s been producing some very ugly cars as of late. There’s the current 4-Series which I still haven’t warmed up to, the XM which is a horrible blocky mess full of fussy elements, and the iX which never quite manages to look confident from any angle. Clearly, I’m not the only person to feel this way, just look at what the internet thinks, starting with Reddit’s r/autos.
[Editor’s Note: I actually don’t agree with Thomas on this one. I recently saw an iX in person, and find it to look legitimately stunning. I even took a photo:
It looks futuristic and cool in person, I think. Then again, The Autopian’s in-house designer, Adrian Clarke, thinks I’m full of it. Just look at what he has to say: Anyway, the booth is awesome, though. -DT] However, it often takes time for an automaker to grow into a new styling language. Early spindle-grilled Lexus models were often incongruous messes, the pre-facelift E65 BMW 7-Series still has the face of a pug, and early quad-headlight Mercedes-Benz models have aged like hot milk. However, every one of these examples was eventually able to find its footing. Lexus now makes the universe-shatteringly gorgeous LC 500, the E60 BMW 5-Series still looks fresh today, and the W211 Mercedes-Benz E-Class looks leagues better than its similarly-themed predecessor. Although BMW’s latest styling has largely produced misses, I have a feeling it’ll all work out eventually. Mind you, that doesn’t stop the hate for now. This is hardly the first time that BMW has doubled-down on its latest controversial styling language. Not only has designer Domagoj Dukec firmly asserted that the era of big grilles will continue in an interview with Top Gear where he stated “All our early kidneys were vertical. So we’re not just doing it for change’s sake. It’s our original,” BMW tried a particularly cringeworthy ad campaign around the iX electric crossover.
Yeah, that’s still difficult to watch. What’s more, BMW paired this strange video with an equally-strange Twitter strategy that, in some ways, was meant to tell people that they should be more open-minded to the iX’s design. “OK boomer” was an internet fad like the Harlem Shake; nobody brings it up anymore. The whole spot desperately reeked of an out-of-touch organization trying to co-opt internet culture, which only alienated the extremely-online. In addition, the phrase itself likely didn’t play well with BMW’s older buyer base, a true lose-lose all-around.
With this booth, things feel different. There’s a sincerity to this latest statement, partly because rendering a concept using physical materials shows conviction, and partly because it’s not defensive. BMW is owning its new grilles, whether people like this styling direction or not. These massive kidneys are now firmly a brand identifier, an unmistakable sign that the car keeping a distance of five feet from your rear bumper is a BMW. What’s more, BMW has little incentive to change. The fanbase of owners who lived and breathed the tagline “The Ultimate Driving Machine” were put off roughly a decade ago when the F30 3-Series debuted with numb electric power steering. BMW hasn’t had the favor of hardcore fans or the internet for years now; why chase an audience that seems to have moved on?
Don’t get me wrong, there are still a handful of recent BMW models that are great to drive. The current M3 and the limited-edition M5 CS are proof that somewhere deep in Munich, driving still matters. However, BMW wants you to know that it’s no longer the company it used to be and that everyone needs to get used to it and those big grilles. In some ways, this isn’t a bad thing; the interior on the new 7-Series is absolutely spectacular. That doesn’t mean we have to always like the brand’s exterior styling though. (Photo credits: BMW, Reddit, Twitter)
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I wonder who, (will it be BMW?) will be the first to pioneer a system to clear dead pedestrians off of their grills. Maybe they will just put some sort of cuisinart blades in them to grind up the road kill. I mean dead bugs on the windshield are a nuisance, but these pesky humans. Can’t someone PLEASE THINK OF THE DRIVERS?
Chairman: Norbert Reithofer (b. 1956) CEO: Oliver Zipse (b. 1964)
Do they even know what words mean?
The Spindle Grill is and always will be a mistake that cannot be fixed no matter how beautiful the rest of the car. It is only a combination of shame avoidance and arrogance that keeps it alive.
The iX is indeed a mess. I saw one the other day. Yuck! Dame Edna with a bustle butt redux.
Does anyone else detect a whiff of German Arrogance? Not that that has ever happened before.
The BMW grill is getting dangerously close to being the head of a penis. I think there may being some unconscious phallic shit happening there. I’m not kidding.
I’ll say it’s optioned however you want.
And the grilles…THE CAR DOESN’T EVEN NEED GRILLES! There is no internal combustion engine to cool. I like BMW more than most but the iX is an unholy mess of a car and the 4 series/M3 will never grow on me. They’re hideous…and the LOL THIS IS WHAT WE DO LOSERS, DEAL WITH IT OR BUY SOMETHING ELSE attitude of the company is incredibly off-putting.
You know what? I’d been considering an M2, X3 M40i, or an M440i as my next car but maybe I should look elsewhere. The current RS3 isn’t exactly a gorgeous car but in the darker colors it can reasonably be said to have some sleeper appeal…and I’d rather have that than beaver teeth up front telling everyone I have no taste.
I did see one in a nice green the other day. I felt bad for the pigments having to lay upon that sheetmetal and plastics, but it was a great color.
BTW you take hot milk add cocoa you get hot chocolate. I like hot chocolate
All in all, this points towards fast-charging BEVs needing the same or more grille area, but it can be located in different places since its most often used when the vehicle is stationary so there’s no need to stick it all on the nose to take advantage of vehicle speed.
If they’d just hop up the 3 cylinder it would be perfect.
From another article “In 2021, almost 40% of BMW’s sales came from China. Not only that, but its growth in the Chinese market is such that if current market growth trends continue, by 2023 the brand will sell more vehicles in China than in all of Europe combined.”
The Chinese market likes the slightly over-the-top front end styling, and they buy a lot of cars. Not much additional analysis or hand wringing is required.
I think the real reason is attention (whether good or bad) is the new social currency, and it’s this BMW is leaning into.
Oversized grilles aside, the underlying fundamental proportions are still all wrong.
Thanks.
The funniest part to me is that as major cities start banning cars with ICE engines, BMW has doubled down on this visual cue from when cars had radiators, it reminds me of the time period when cars had vertical radiators with temp gauges on them, then they became morphed overtime to just a grill and a hood ornament, and eventually those entire proportions were dropped and labeled as antique because they’re out of date.
One of the reasons I like older BMWs is their minimalism, they’re like a good suit, they never go out of style. Today’s BMWs are an incohesive mess of lines and scallops and scoops and GIANT NOSTRILS and it’s just not going to look good very long, and will go out of style quickly. Plus, most new cars have all that crazy styling to hide the fact that the proportions of the car look like utter dogshit.
It doesn’t even look good now.
